In the spirit of Valentines Day, let's talk about LOVE
Love is a beautiful thing, and every February, we are reminded of its beauty as we celebrate Valentine’s Day. For seniors who have lived a life full of love and family, and have experienced loss, the holiday can be a reminder of times past. Even the idea of finding love later in life might be overwhelming. However, love can be found at any age. Whether 15 or 85, everyone is deserving of love and can find it if they are open.
It happens more than you think!
My own grandmother found love in her 70s, after having been widowed for nearly 20 years, with a man who was her neighbor when she was a newlywed. Finding love later in life happens. The two reconnected and bonded over their shared memories as newlywed couples and have been happily together ever since. Finding love later in life is possible, but there are things to keep in mind on the journey.
Be clear about your intentions
There is no wrong way to have a relationship in your golden years, but you must be clear about what you are looking for out of a love connection so that both parties are on the same page. Whether you want someone to go to the movies and share occasional meals with or a sexual partner and soulmate, it is up to you but know what you want from a relationship before jumping into one.
Talk to your loved ones
Your family may not be fully supportive at first. Your children and grandchildren have an idea of who you are supposed to be in their heads, and they may find it difficult to see you with anyone besides your former spouse. Know that you are allowed to fall in love again and that doing so does not change the love you had with your spouse. Open communication is always the best, but if and only if you feel safe sharing.
Don’t try to replace the person you once had
When you are older, it can be easy to compare a new relationship to a past one, but doing so is a disservice to both you and your new partner. Your new love is not a replacement for your old one. It is best to look at every new relationship like a new adventure. Finding love later in life should be fun. Take time learning about your partner so you can appreciate them for who they are.
Put yourself out there, and have confidence that you are deserving of love. Many people feel like it is hard to find love, but the modern age makes finding love easier than ever. If you aren’t able to meet anyone through local groups, try looking online. Many dating sites now exist that cater to an older audience. These aren’t the dating sites that your granddaughter is using, so try it out. Not every connection will lead to a date, but you can have conversations with people and grow your confidence that love is out there for you.
Reconnect with old friends
Let people know that you are open to finding love again. As my grandma reconnected with her old neighbor and found love, you can too. Sometimes all it takes is putting it out there that you’re looking, and you’ll find something you never expected. Social media is a great way to keep in touch with old high school sweethearts, friends you haven’t seen in years, and dozens of potential love connections.
Finally, don’t get discouraged!
Finding love later in life is probably a brand new experience for most. Love isn’t something that happens overnight, but once you find it make sure to go for it! Nothing is sweeter than finding a connection with someone, no matter your age.
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